6 Ways to Feel More Empowered as a Woman Online Dating
Make no apologies for who you are, what you want, or how you feel.
Being an empowered woman doesn’t mean acting like a man.
What it really means is getting comfortable embracing your vulnerability, taking that wall down that many of us put up, and being brave enough to get out of your comfort zone and look possible rejection in the eye and say, “so what?”
Here are 5 ways to help you feel more empowered when online dating (FYI ladies: nobody can take your power unless you sign it away to them).
1. Make the first move - please!
Data from dating sites shows that men respond very well to women who take charge and send the first message. Yet, according to findings from Zoosk, women are still taking a back seat to men when it comes to making first contact (women are 3.5x less likely to take the lead compared to men).
A lot of this has to do with the concept of traditional gender roles and the perception of effort. Women think that with online dating, men have it easier than ever - so if he’s really interested, he should put in the small amount of effort it takes to say hi.
But when you don’t make the first move, you’re not taking your own wants or needs into account. You’re simply responding to what someone else wants.
Let’s change that. Because the empowered woman doesn’t wait - she acts.
2. Remember You Know What You Want Better Than Anyone Else
You know what you want, so go after it. This might mean including something in your Zoosk or Match profile about the kind of relationship you’re looking for or including the hobbies you actually enjoy, and not the ones you think a man will find attractive (if you love bingeing on reality television, just say it!).
Don’t hide your quirks, embrace them. The goal isn’t to attract the most men possible. Lead with your personality and get specific about what you want, so you can attract the right men.
3. See rejection as incompatibility
It’s normal to feel like we don’t measure up when we get rejected, but what if we all stopped taking things so personally?
The reality is, rejection just means you’re not compatible with someone. And the sooner we find this out, the better, because we save ourselves time in a dead-end relationship, and we gain a much clearer idea of who we are suited for, and who we should be looking for.
Learn to see rejection as a valuable lesson that is getting you one step closer to the right person.
4. Accept that you’re beautiful no matter what
Until you see yourself as beautiful, inside and out, you’re going to have a hard time attracting anyone else who sees it. This is how you’ll learn to ignore what other people think and say about you - because you’ll no longer be basing your worth on other people’s opinions.
Focus on all of your strengths and qualities, embrace your unique self, and know that there will be someone who recognizes all of the beauty within you. Self-acceptance is key to empowering yourself.
5. Respect yourself
Self-respect is crucial to finding and maintaining a healthy relationship, and being strong enough to walk away from anything that is in conflict with your inner values and beliefs about what is and is not okay.
What you’ll find is, the more you respect yourself, the more others will respect you too.
6. Enjoy the moment you’re in
We’ve all had bad dating experiences - but don’t let that stop you from enjoying the moment. Go ahead and daydream about your future life together if that’s what you want to do after a few days of flirty text messaging. Let go and allow yourself to be vulnerable and loopy with happiness, even if you’ve been hurt in the past. Embrace those tiny moments, because those are the best parts of dating. But in the back of your head, always know that if the bubble does burst, you’ll be okay.
And if you’re looking for a better online dating experience head over to Zoosk. With smart matching and millions of singles, it can be the key to making online dating work for you.